


What Is Love?- The Shattered Memory

by ryuwatanabe



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 16:03:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9449360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryuwatanabe/pseuds/ryuwatanabe
Summary: The love story between two young man, it was an unconditional love- a young man was trying his best to help  his love one to regain the shattered memory.Kim Junmyeon aka Suho was a leader of world famous k-pop group, Exo. Soft, strong, kind hearted, selfless, he took care all of the members well to the point that he forgot about himself. He loved all of the members equally, he loved them more than himself.Park Chanyeol was one of the members. A sweet, soft hearted, a very sensitive and most of the times, a very sentimental person despite behind he so called 'Happy Virus' personality. Likes other members in the group, he had been taken well by Suho.Park Chanyeol admired Suho's leadership and as the times passed by, it was the admiration haboured to something new - an intricate feeling that he tried to denied it all the way - he couldn't be selfish to claim Suho for himself, could him?Park chanyeol lived his life in uncertainty until one accident that almost made him lose Suho. Suho loss his memory and almost everything.





	1. epilogue

**Author's Note:**

> Hi,   
> It's me again with my suyeol otp. This is my second fanfict. The first one still not completed yet (yeah, I know it's gonna take likes forever to complete that one)  
> Funny enough though, despite of my constant reminder to myself that I will write suhan fanfict, I've ended up with another suyeol. Hahaha. Forgive me, I think, it was quite hard no to fall in love with this otp. How come you not fall in love with them. They looked matched to each other, isn't it?  
> I was quite amuse by myself that I always ending up my suho to be someone with memory loss or become comatose for long times. Sure enought, I dont write smut, so there will be no bottom suho, but suho will definitely become non dominant in relationship. What have I done to my baby...huhu, forgive me.   
> To tell the truth, this is not my style of writing.I love to write thriller more than anything. But why not give it a chance to something new and simple?   
> This is medium short story, not too short, and not too long. While awaiting 'My Beautiful Sword' to be completed, let enjoy this one medium short story.

** Winter season 2017.  **

 

It is in a middle of winter season. Everything is so white outside. I am standing besides the window, just enjoying the scenery whereby the snow slowly falling down from the sky. Only a few people walk across the street. My attention is directed toward a couple who are walking slowly, holding each other's hands. 

So beautiful. The scenary, the scenario. 

And I hope, I will enjoy doing the same thing with you, who is currently in your deep slumber and it really seem likes eternity. 

It have been almost 6 months, 

_It have been almost 6 months.._

I sighed as I remind my self. I sighed as I count the days that I've wait for you. I have been waiting for you to open your eyes, because I strongly believe that day will come. Because I want to be the first person that you'll look at when you finally open your eyes. 

I walk back to you, the 'sleeping beauty' man and sit besides you. I have been doing this for almost 6  months. 

You are beautiful, Kim Junmyeon, and in your sleeping state, you just look likes a doll. I could just stare at you for the whole day, doing nothing. My hand slowly reach your face, caress your pale cheeck. Your 'snow white' skin feel so smooth and silky, I think I will never grow tired off. And then, my hand make it way toward your plum rossy lip. 

Unexpectedly, my face slowly moved toward yours. My heart uncontrollably make a sound 'lub dub' racing through my ribcage quite annoyingly. But, just as my lip a few inches from yours....

_Snap it out, Park Chanyeol._

_He never know you gonna do this to him..this is so wrong. You can not do this to him._

_For God sake, control yourself, Park Chanyeol!!!!_

So, I end up plant my kiss on your forehead. It is something completely pure, innocent and sweet for my falling angel. Yes, you are my falling angel, Kim Junmyeon. 

"I love you. Even if you know nothing in this world, I want you to know that. Even if you loss all of your memory, I want you to remember that, I am the only who love you the most." I whisper straight to your ears. I don't give up my hope, although I am doubt that you probably hear that. 

I entangle my large hand with your small, cold one before falling asleep besides you. 

*

"I love you. Even if you know nothing in this world, I want you to know that. Even if you loss of you memory, I want you to remember that, I am the only one who love you the most."

I feel somebody whispered right into my ear. I slowly open my eyes, but everything seem to be unfamiliar to me, it is so blurry and foggy.My eyelids stutter for a few moments, trying their best to adjust with the light. Luckly, the room was not so bright.  

When I completely open my eyes, I look toward my right side. Right there, there is a young man in his sleeping state, with his face hiding toward the mattress. I only could see his shining black hair. 

_Owh, it was only in your dream. There is no way this sleeping man whisper something to your ears._

Then, I notice another warm hand holding my small one. It must be quite some times, that my hand feel quite aching, so I accidentally move my hand, and this little movement make the young man fidgeted. I completely wake him from his nap. His eyes wide open, as if he is in shock. 

But I can not figure out, why he was in that state. It couldn't be because I open my eyes or wake up from my sleep, isn't it? It is not something abnormal.

But yet, a moment later, this young guy jump toward me and almost crash my upper body. He seem likes a lost puppy that excited to finally meet his owner? Except that he is a giant version and i could not handle him well. 

He hug me so tightly, so tightly that I feel as if I run out of air. It is warm, but at the same time suffocated. But I am too weak to avoid or fight back, so I just return his hug with my small pat on his back. Why he hold me so tight as if I am his precious thing? Why he act likes likes he already loss me once? 

I feel so confuse. 

After a while, he depart himself from mine. "Ah, I am sorry. I almost make you chock." he finally say. But, I only give him my weak smile. 

Weird. 

And awkward at the same time. 

It is supposed to be funny. Both of us are supposed to have a good laugh, but no, it don't happen. 

"But who am I? And who you are?" 

To my horror, I think my lip utter something that I really meant to say, but no sound come out from my voice box. 

But, this young man seem to be understanding something. He attentively try to do some lip reading because his eyes is directed toward my moving lip. 

*

"But who am I ? And who you are ?"

I try to decipher what you're saying. I am quite good in lip reading. 

And I think I am ready for this. But in reality I am not.I feel sudden pang in my heart. Not only you can not remember my name, but your own name as well. 

"You are Kim Junmyeon"

"Kim Jun..myeoon?" Unheard voice, but you point your forefinger toward yourself. 

"Yes you are.." I smile and weakly nod my head. "I am Park Chanyeol.."I introduce myself, it feel as if it is our first time meet each other. Yes, at least it is your first time, as your memory of ours had been vanished. 

"Kim Junmyeon..Park Chanyeol ..Kim Junmyeon..Park Chanyeol."

You keep mumbling the same name again and again likes a mantra. 

You keep staring at you hands which move freely. 

But suddenly you frown. At first I couldn't figure out why until you remove your own blanket. 

"My legs. I can't move." You look at me deeply, as if trying to search for some meaning. 

You gritted your teeth, struggling plastered all over your face as you try once more to lift up your lower limbs. 

" My legs Chanyeol, what have happened to my legs? I want to move chanyeol, I am really want." You give me your frustrated look. 

 Suddenly, I feel a surge of emotional outburst and the need to protect you. Without any inhibition,  I hug you once more. 

This time even more tight than before. I let my tear fall down. I dont care any more. I cry out loud as I squeeze your back. 

"I am sorry Jun. I am really sorry. What have happened to you is totally my fault. Please forgive me, Jun. "

 I continue sobbing in front of the person who is dearest to me. I hug him tightly,  as if there is no tomorrow for us. I try to console both of us. 

As I continue engulfing you in my arm, I suddenly realise something- how small, and thin you are. Owh my Gosh, you feel so fragile in my arm. I want to protect each and every part of you. 

*

" I am sorry Jun. I am really sorry. What have happened to you is totally my fault.Please forgive me, Jun."

That is what the guy name Park Chanyeol say to me, pleading for my forgiveness. But I keep calmly silent, I can't reply to any of his words because I understand nothing. I feel confuse when I listen to his mumbling. None of them make sense to me.

_Your fault? How come it become your fault?_

_Forgiveness?why you seek for my forgiveness?_

For crying out loud, this guy for sure has a sensitive heart. Park Chanyeol shamelessly cry as he hold me in his arm. He rest his head on to my crown. I honestly feel solace. 

"I forgive you, Park Chanyeol." I said to him once I separated my self from him. 

He softly nod. 

"Let me take care of you, Jun."  That is what he say before hugging me for another umpteenth times. 

 


	2. The Encouter

It had been two days since Kim Junmyeon regained his consciousness. 

All other exo members already paid their visit. His parents and elder brother as well. 

Kim Junmyeon had to struggle a lot, especially remembering his previous group members. It was not an easy task to remember 10 others. 

But at least, he had a rough idea regarding who he was and what he used to be. He should take it slow, little by little. He should not force his brain to take everything all at once. 

"Tell me Chanyeol, how we first met each other?"

Park Chanyeol was taken aback for a moment. "Hahaha..you might not want to hear this...".He laughed nervously. 

"Why not?"

"Because we were not in a good term at that time."

"But..you already promised me that you'll tell everything about my past.."

"Okay then if you insist...." Park Chanyeol took a deep breath. 

*

**May 2008**

 

He was a seventeen years old high schoolers. A very naughty, mischievous, troublemaker and not sensible one. Owh, okay, no good word about him so far, wasn't?

He accomplished one thing at this age, becoming a trainee in a biggest k pop company in Korean history, The SM Entertainment. And it was not without putting any effort. It happened after winning second place in 2008 Smart Model Contest. 

The very first day always be the hardest day. 

Yes, indeed it was true, even for a street smart guy likes him. 

And at the same time, a big company such as SM Entertainment already had planned ahead. 

They said he had a same vibe of 'happy -happy' with certain some one. According to their predilection, they would blend to each other very well. They should promote together. 

He just a trainee in a very first day, knew less, but yet this big company already put a high expectation on him. 

"He is one of the trainee who has a lot of potential..." so that  was how  the saying about three years senior spread. 

"His name is Kim Junmyeon. Please remember that, " one of their superior said while showing the said name profile. 

"Kim Junmyeon..." he repeated that name several time once he out from the superior room.

Weird name. He giggled. 

"Please remember that!!!" He mocked. Eyes rolled upward. 

The biggest challenge was not the first day but there was something just ahead of first day. 

"You have to follow Kim Junmyeon everyday.."

" Learn from him, learn with him..."

Those words echoed in his yodas ears. Words of wisdom. He was okay with the second advice, but for the first advice, sound so..

..creepy?

Out of sudden he felt goosebump. The first idea sound so crazy. Everybody must think he was nut. 

Too much thought, at the end, the conclusion was it was too painful in the ass. 

_Take it as a challenge, Park Chanyeol. You can do this. Chaiyook!!!_

He encouraged himself. He should not give a damn for the other trivial thing when the most important thing of all is to be a successful idol. 

The first step in approaching your hyung is to introduce yourself right?

That was the right thing he should done first. 

"Hi, Kim Junmyeon hyung right?" Park Chanyeol politely greeted once he saw his 'target.'

The said boy knitted his eyebrows curiously. "Yes, I am.."

"My name is Park Chanyeol. Today is my first day as a trainee here. Please take care of me hyung. "

                                 ~~~~~~~~

He followed Kim Junmyeon everywhere. 

_This big yoda cling to Junmyeon hyung almost everywhere..Just great Park Chanyeol..just great..._

He was mumbling under a breath,  more toward himself. 

When Kim Junmyeon was practising, he would be watching at the side. 

When Kim Junmyeon went to eat, he immediately followed the elder. 

When Kim Junmyeon went to toilet.....

First day no problem

Second day pass, forgive him

Third day, grrrrr...<%®¿<( kim Junmyeon started to curse internally)

Fourth day, when Park Chanyeol followed Kim Junmyeon to the toilet, that was the day the drama started. (Eh, seriously, did he need to follow kim Junmyeon to the toilet as well?)

"Why do you keep following me?" 

Park Chanyeol didn't have any other thought, he just blindly followed what the company instructed him to do. So, he mindlessly say "I didn't know either"

"What is your goal in life, Park Chanyeol..."the elder asked with his serious tone.

What the heck? Was there any connection between following him and having a goal? And in all seriousness, this hyung was no fun. 

No fun at all. 

He didn't answer the second question. How could him? Out of blue, that question of life was thrown to him mercilessly. Owh, come on, he was just seventeen. SEVENTEEN. 

His mind went blank. 

But, what he didn't expect the most was, the next words that came out from the well known soft spoken elder. 

"If you can't find your goal in life, then don't follow me around."

It was a sudden smash straight to his heart. Wow, this hyung could be sour in his words. 

He was left dumbfounded there. Wow, quadraple pang. His body felt numb all over because of his hyung word. 

Following that, he made a vow not to follow this 'particular hyung' anymore. He had his own dignity as well. 

*

"Ah, seriously Chanyeol, did I say that to you?" Kim Junmyeon giggled for the very first time. His eyes crescent in shape. 

His voice still not return to his original state but becoming better.

"Yes you did.." Park chanyeol pouted. If you don't believe me, I can show you something.  

He took his ipad and searched for the 'couple talk - chansu'. Together they watched the show. 

Following that, they also watched another exo showcase, concert together, including their famour 'Exo - Showtime'.


	3. The Love Story Unfold

Park Chanyeol became the last Exo member to be officially introduced to the public on 23rd February. 

He himself was surprised by the news. Never across his mind that the person who was going to fill up the last available vacancy and completed the group was him. 

And, to be the same group with Kim Junmyeon. That what the last thing he ever wish for. No, not the last thing, he should rephrase it - he never ever wish for - sound better now. 

**It was kinda of fate?**

It seemed to him that their fate of being together forever already been neatly written somewhere on the seventh layers of the galaxy. 

No matter how hard he tried to avoid Kim Junmyeon, he could not run away from the elder likes forever. 

No matter what ever he did to avoid that-not-so-fun hyung, it seemed that the fate said the otherwise -it hold them together even closer. 

No, it must be a mistake somewhere. 

It almost impossible   to be the fate that was doing this thing. It must be because of their company and their plan. The SM Entertainment want them to be together from the start, right?

So it must be because of the company's plan, and not because of the fate. 

Park Chanyeol tried to reassured himself. Trying to deny every possibility between him and Kim Junmyeon - because he hated that hyung with every cells that he had. 

And that hyung must have hate him as well, moreover with the idea of being in the same group. 

Kim Junmyeon must be thinking that he didn't deserve to be in Exo. 

 

 

 

But he made a big mistake of thinking that way about Kim Junmyeon. 

Just one month before their debut, the company made them to live together in a dorm. 

No chance at all to avoid Kim Junmyeon. 

But from there, he got to know the person with stage name Suho better. 

"Hey Chanyeol. Congrats to be one of the members. We have another one and half months to go. Let work hard together, hwaiting!!!"

"Chanyeol, do you already have your breakfast?"

"Chanyeol, are you allright? You should have a proper rest.."

"I'm going out to grocery now. Do you want anything, Chanyeol?"

 He checked up each and everyone of exo's members, including him. 

Those questions were among the common questions that Kim Junmyeon would ask to any member, nothing extra ordinary in particular. But for Park Chanyeol, this little gesture mean a lot to him. 

At first, of course Park Chanyeol didn't want to admit on how good Kim Junmyeon as a leader because he still had a grudge against the leader. 

But Suho, as his stage name, really live up to his name, - a guardian of exo. He proved himself and the others that he was worth to be a leader. 

As the times went by, they became closer and enjoyed each other's company. They understood each other better. From hate, it turned into an admiration. Park Chanyeol admire Kim Junmyeon's leadership. 

 

"Leadership is the one with the most authority or those who holds the highest position isn't always a real leader."

"But Suho hyung lower himself and treat us with that kind of attitude. "

"It is actually not easy. Because a leader is a position that can easily be missused. "

 "But to be likes Suho hyung who can really embrace and accept sacrifying himself - thinking of others before himself is something very hard to do. When I see him doing this, I think I want to learn from him."~Park Chanyeol, Couple Talk, 2015, SuChan. 

 

Some unwanted or unfavourable comments might say that Kim Junmyeon's personality didn't fit at all to be a leader, especially for a big group like exo. They favoured more toward Exo-M, Kris. 

Ouch, it hurt. In all definition, it hurt. 

Little those peole know, it is not easy to be a leader. Well, it is never easy to be a good leader. 

To be somebody who can dependable on is much more difficult. 

During his initial stage as a leader, there was a dispute regarding his leadership. Even some members doubted his ability. They have even better member to fill up the position. 

But, Kim Junmyeon was somebody who will take his role earnestly without any complain. He took every harsh comments that were thrown to him with smile, and improved himself to be a better leader. 

"Once Suho hyung is determined to do something, he put everything into it."

"Once he start working out, he tries till the end. "

"Once he start studying, he need to reach to the top before he can turn to something else."~Park Chanyeol for Problematic Man 2015.

He never stop or rest till he get the best result. He was called Earnest Suho not for nothing. 

Yes, he was Earnest Suho, a Guardian of Exo.

 

As the time sailed by, he had gained trust from all of the members. He had proved himself and the others including netizen that afterall his personality was what Exo need the most. 

They may have better candidate, but Kim Junmyeon's leadership was unique to Exo. If anyone could be a leader, it should be only Kim Junmyeon and no body else. 

 

 

Yes, one and only Kim Junmyeon, aka Suho. 

He was small, midget size only, but his heart was big

He was delicate, look so fragile, but yet he was strong. 

He looked so soft, but yet his word was firm. 

So much paradox things about Kim Junmyeon that entice Park Chanyeol's interest. 

In all honesty, he looked nothing likes a leader. Who will ever thought that he was a leader of the most successful k pop group in the world? 

"He gives us an impression of pampered prince, likes a pampered little flower, but the jungle is really in the wild."

Despite all of the hassles, difficulties, dispute, hate, and controversions, this beautiful leader still stood up proud in front of their fan. Till the end.  Nothing could bring him down. He was a lot stronger than he look. 

"Exo- we are one, " he initiated and followed by other in every Exo's stage perfomance. 

Never once he get tired in saying out their golden motto. 

Park Chanyeol had deep thought everytime before going to sleep. He was wondering on how Kim Junmyeon keeping  up with all those things. 

To lessen up the burden of being a sole leader, Park Chanyeol sometimes act as  a shadow leader. It was not official though. It just came out naturally from him to protect his precious leader. 

 

 

 

Kim Junmyeon of course so oblivious. After all, he was a leader. He should treat all the of members fairly and equally. 

But Park Chanyeol knew all the way, the leader loved one of the Exo-M member. His heart burned inside, but he still able to joke around regarding the leader's infatuation to Luhan.

Yes, that member was Luhan. But it was easily understandable. He wore the same facade likes Kim Junmyeon. He was beautiful inside out, likes an angel to the group. 

During one of their first fan meeting, Exo-Showcase, the members had been asked which members that the got attracted first. 

"Was there any member you wanted to become friend because he was handsome likes I did to siwon?, " Leeteuk who was the MC during that time asked. 

"I had a crush on Luhan from Exo - m."

"I love you.."

"At first sight.."

 

"The first time I saw Luhan I thought he was really beautiful. For our concert, we almost had crossdressing event. During the concert, Luhan was fooling around backstage by wearing a wig just for fun. I didn't know it was him and I asked other people who is that beautiful girl."~Kim Junmyeon for Mnet xoxo preview, 2014. 

 

Kim Junmyeon's unrequited love to Luhan didn't stop there. He never stop to love Luhan no matter what. He was earnest Suho remember?

18.8.2014 during Nanjing Music Festival. 

"Want to ask Jun Myun, what's your ideal type now? Is it still literally young girl with long straight hair?"

"Luhan, luhan.."the fan was screaming before Kim Junmyeon could ever answer. 

"Yes..erm, I seem once said it would be like the look of Luhan when he's wearing a wig. But it's so pity that Luhan is not a girl.." Kim Junmyeon gave his answer, but not completely honest. The last sentence should be.. But it's so pity that Luhan is not into another boy. 

Park Chanyeol just looked at them, sitting far away from the other corner. 

"How do members like Jun Myun's woman dressing in this SM Town family concert?"

 But, Park Chanyeol gave an answer as if to give a hint to Kim Junmyeon that 'it's okay to get rejected because i'll still there for you'. 

"I shocked and he have changed my thought regarding crossdressing. I used to disgusted by this phenomenon before, but Suho hyung was really pretty..."

"I also think Suho's ideal type should be himself, not me.." Luhan also agreed with Park Chanyeol on that note. 

But Luhan's moment with them was short life. No body would ever doubt he was too precious. Everybody love Luhan. No body could ever hate Luhan. They tried to stop Luhan from coming out from group but it was futile effort. 

"I am sorry, but our precious Luhan can not make out for today. He is sick. Let pray for his faster recovery. To luhan, please recover fast, we miss you alot. Exo saranghaja..." ~Kim Junmyeon during fan meeting in Bangkok, Thailand. 

The rumour regarding Luhan departure already spreaded at that time, but most of the members in denial state. Every body could sense that the leader tried to hide something during interview. He still smiled although fake one. He was a leader after all, he should appear strong in front of their fan. 

Shortly after Nanjing Music Festival, Luhan officially left the group on October 2014. Sehun,  xiumin and Suho hold dearest to his heart in Exo. His picture with those three could still be seen in his Ig. 

 

 

 

"I love Luhan hyung."

"Yes, I know. I love Luhan hyung too" 

But of course in different kind of  way. Suho's love toward Luhan was somehow in special kind of way, while Park chanyeol as dongsae-subaenim. 

Kim Junmyeon rarely cried in front of others, what more in front of Park Chanyeol, his dongsae. If anything, it would be always Park Chanyeol who will seek the leader for solace. But tonight, the leader just let it go. Because he could not hold any more any longer. But, Park Chanyeol was happy to be a reliever because it mean to have Kim Junmyeon in his embrace.  Happy and sad at the same time. 

"I've try my best to stop him from leaving the group..Tell me Chanyeol-shi, is there anything lacking in me? Tell me why he left us?.." kim Junmyeon stuttered in his sobing mess. 

"Yes, I know you've try your best. There nothing lacking in you, suho hyung. It's his decision that he think the best for him. Let whish him all the best in china."

"But, it's so painful, it's still hurt Chanyeol-shi."

"It's okay..you can cry whenever you want with me. You still have me, you still have us, Suho hyung.."Park Chanyeol tried to comfort the cried leader. But, at the same time, his own feeling was hurt. Hurt to see the dearest person in his life was sad. Also, because he knew,  Kim Junmyeon never love him the way he loved the other. There was no way he could replace Luhan in Kim Junmyeon's heart. 

 

 

 

"I think my favourite song is 'beautiful'. It suit Suho hyung's voice very well. That was the very first time I realised how beautiful Suho hyung's voice was. I fee likes I fall in love with Suho hyung at first sight during this moment. "~Park Chanyeol for Exocast 2015.

"I love you too.." the leader softly replied. 

It was actually a confession, but because it was made in front of public and was aired live, nobody take it seriously. Even the leader as well, thinking Park Chanyeol was fooling around, so he might play as well. There will no way he was serious in front of others. 

In reality, Park Chanyeol was chicken out to make confession face to face. He didn't have any gut. So, he intentionally use that chance to express his feeling because there will no way the leader will take him seriously if he confess in front of others. But, it would be good as well if Kim Junmyeon notice something. ONLY IF. Park Chanyeol wanted to play with probability. 

 

To love some one is nothing

To be loved by someone is something

But to be loved by the one you love is everything. 

 

Unfortunately, luck was not Park Chanyeol's side. Kim Junmyeon was so oblivious to notice the younger's feeling toward him. 

Park Chanyeol knew, he was running out of times. It should be now or never. After so many years, he decided to clear everything up. He might lose Kim Junmyeon, but it is better than having to regret it later. 

He must settle his own feeling once and for all. He knew he was nothing, but at least, he wanted to make Kim Junmyeon feel something. 

 

May 2017. 

It was on 21st , one day before Kim Junmyeon 27th birthday. So, a date dinner it was, at the back of Park Chanyeol's mind. Kim Junmyeon never know  that the rapper was going to confess to him. 

 He picked Kim Junmyeon up at his appartment. He was just riding a scooter because he wanted Kim Junmyeon to hug him from behind. He loved it when the elder depend on him. 

The riding was fun and all, both shared their excitement together. Park Chanyeol enjoyed the feeling of being embraced from the back by the smaller one. The elder sometimes clutched the younger's shirt as if his life dependent on it when ever Park Chanyeol was speeding up. 

"Oppa..Oppa.." Kim Junmyeon screamed because of fear. Out of nowhere the word 'oppa' came out from the leader. But Park Chanyeol loved it when the elder called him 'oppa' and this triggered his excitement more. 

They almost one of the intersection when the traffic light showed the orange colour. 

"Chanyeol,we should slow down and stop." Kim Junmyeon said in serious tone, no longer called him 'oppa.'

Ignoring the advice, Park Chanyeol continue to speed up in an attempt to chase the remaining time. When they reached at the center of  intersection, they had been crushed by another car. 

Park Chanyeol only had several minor injuries but the one who had to endure the most serious impact was Kim Junmyeon. His body thudded on to street light. 

The sight of injured Kim Junmyeon- severely mutilated and disfigurement send shivers down to his spine. He should feel pain because he himself was injured, but instead of that he felt numb all over his body. He was out of word. 

He can't afford to lose Kim Junmyeon. 

He felt his world become dark. He couldn't stand still. His legs did not have any strenght. Literally, all over his body felt weak as if all of his remaining energy had been sucked out from him. 

 

 

"I'm sorry but we had tried everything we could. Kim Junmyeon is severely injured, and normally the chance of surviving in this kind of injury is low. It is miracle that he still survive. For the time being, this is the best we could offer. He still in his life and death battle. We are not sure whether he can make it through or not. Let pray for his recovery. But be ready for anything anytime." The surgeon who lead the operation said after coming out from operation theatre. 

Park chanyeol felt so bizzare that he became speechless. His eyes caught a glimpse of comatose intubated Kim Junmyeon that was lying down on the trolley.

 


	4. You're My Bunny, My Light Saber, My everything

"Hahaha..Chanyeol, what kind of stick is this?" Kim Junmyeon asked while trying to play with the stick. 

"This is lightsaber Jun. This is one your most favourite thing. You used to be starwars geek and the lightsaber is one of its merchandise." Park Chanyeol excitedly explained. "You used to play with lightsaber a lot.."

"Really?Can I see it if you catch any?"

"Ah yeah, I'll show the one that I shared on my Ig"

"Hahaha..I looked funny" Kim Junmyeon chuckled while watching himself in action.

"Hahaha..no, you looked just fine. Actually you looked so beautiful when you play lightsaber, likes a prince.."

"Don't you think your compliment is a little bit too much..I'm embarrassing right now..." Kim Junmyeon loved the compliment, it sound honest, but still unable to help himself from feeling flustered. He tapped Park Chanyeol lightly on the shoulder. 

 

 

A few weeks later, the younger brought him another stuff. Rabbit plushy and real rabbit. 

"Auw, so cute..," he said while hugging the plushy. 

"Yes so cute...but you're cuter. You was one of our cutest member Jun. Just likes a little bunny in our group, " Park Chanyeol explained while showing the ex leader the video whereby all of them wore the animal mascot. 

"I don't know what to say. But thank you a lot, Chanyeol"

 

 

So, that was how it went since the past 2 months he had regained his consciousness. The season already changed to spring. 

It was nice to have Park Chanyeol as his company. This happy virus had a great sense of humour. The young guy never fail to make his time with him. He never miss even for one day as for a record. 

Never he see the younger got tired, bored or anything. If anyone else, he or she must grow tired already. Who would ever bother to spend their precious time with handicapped person likes him. But Park Chanyeol was different from the others. He had patience and perseverance. 

Sometimes, it made Kim Junmyeon wondering what give the strength to this guy to spend his precious time just to be with him?The tall guy spend almost 24 hours, seven days per week with him. 

Does this guy has his own work or anything? He should have. But later on, kim Junmyeon learn that the younger already quit from the group. He felt so bad and guilty. Park Chanyeol shouldn't spend his time more on him that he ignore his own welfare. 

Is it something normal to sacrifice your own life just for handicapped person likes him?

Park Chanyeol was his friend, all right..

But his sacrifice was something unconditional..

It was not normal either as a friend, unless there was something beyond friendship, isn't it?

 

 

Another thing that amuse Kim Junmyeon was Park Chanyeol never call him 'hyung'. He just call him Jun. Not that he bother, in fact he liked it. No, the word 'like' was understatement when he actually love it.  He love it when 'Jun' been uttered by the younger. 

 But still, it make him wonder why Park Chanyeol didn't call him 'hyung' for normality in their culture?

And, Unfortunately, despite spending so much time together, he still unable to remember his past. He still didn't remember who was Park Chanyeol. 

But, only one thing that he was sure about himself. He hopelessly fall in love with the guy name Park Chanyeol. He no longer care about his past, because all he had now was his present and future. 

Nevertheless, he didn't put any hope for Park Chanyeol to reciprocate his feeling. The younger still had bright future ahead and shouldn't waste his time on handicapped person likes him. But at least, he came to his own term . 

 

 

"Chanyeol, can we have a walk outside for a while. It kinda stuffy inside.."

So, they had a walk with Park Chanyeol pushing his wheelchair from behind. They remained silent throughout the hallway, both of them indulging themselves with the beautiful scenery. It was spring afterall. 

 "Chanyeol, when you plan to get marry?you're tall, handsome, sweetheart and all, for sure all the girls woulfd fall for you..," Kim Junmyeon initiated the conversation. 

Yes, that was the right question to ask because he didn't want the younger to sacrifice his youth just for him. This guy had a bright future ahead of him. 

But, Park Chanyeol didn't answer. 

Nevertheless, he continued to ask. "Chanyeol, why you don't call me hyung?"

That question had caught Park Chanyeol off guard. He suddenly stopped from pushing the wheelchair ahead. It should be the right moment, but he still didn't prepare for revelation of his own feeling. 

 The atmosphere was full of emotion despite lacking any sound of words. 

"Chanyeol, may I tell you something?"

"Yes, sure Jun."

"After hearing this, you're free to make your own decision. I wouldn't force you anything."

"What do you mean Jun?"

"Promise me you will not freak out after hearing this."

"I'm promise..,"

"I'm sorry Chanyeol. After all effort that you've put on me, I still can't remember my past and including you. I still can't remember you. I'm useless right? But..."

"But...?"

"But..I hopelessly in love with somebody who is now standing just behind me.."

"Pardon me?You what Jun?"

"I said, I am in love with you..idiot Park Yoda.."

"You're in love with me?"

Kim Junmyeon didn't know whether it was a joke or not, but all he know was he felt all flustered. He really wanted to run away from Park Chanyeol even by using the wheelchair. His both hands ready to propel the wheel foward when they suddenly being stopped by that man's hands. 

"Owh no, Jun..This is so wrong.." And out of sudden, the younger guy kneeled in one leg in front of him. "I am in love with you since long time ago. Since you're in Exo. But I couldn't bring myself for confession because you were in love with somebody else."

"You know for how long i'm waiting for this moment to come. But hearing your confession likes this one, I still couldn't believe myself." He pinched his own right cheeck just to make sure he was not in dream. "Auww..it hurt"

Idiot, this Park Yoda for sure knew how to ruin their romantic moment with his careless antic. 

Park Chanyeol hold his small hands and brought them on his lap. "Jun, I am the one that should propose to you.The only reason why I don't call you hyung because I want you to be more than my hyung. I want you to be my bunny, my lightsaber, my everything. Will you be mine forever?"

Kim Junmyeon giggled. This Park Yoda still as clumsy as ever. He was not impressed afterall. 

"I want to be your bunny, your lightsaber,  your everything. I guess it is a yes and I am all yours now.." Kim Junmyeon was impressed by his own words. If they were not in cloud nine, for sure he would vomit out blood with his own word. But for now, he was so in love and he should enjoy all of cheesiness. 

The thing that he didn't expect the most was to be carried in bridal style. Suddenly, strong arm scoop him out from his wheelchair. 

"Hey..Park Yoda..put me down.."Kim Junmyeon was pretending to escape. 

"No, I wouldn't. I love to carry you this way..,"

Kim Junmyeon felt so fragile in the younger's arms. Park Chanyeol was so warm that he felt secured and comfort at the same time. At this moment, he stopped struggling and let himself enjoying the younger's heat. The warm hug that made him to remember something. One by one flashes of memories came to him. Out of them, he remembered the warm hug the most -somebody had carried him out just likes this one during one of their stage performance. 

"Lotto..." that word slipped out from his lip naturally. 

"Huh..what did you say?"

"I guess the warmness still the same  back then."

"Huh, what do you mean?" Park Chanyeol gave puzzle look. 

"Suddenly I remember to be carried just likes this way during Lotto performance. The warmness was the same, but I was to oblivious to notice that during that time." Kim Junmyeon chuckled for umpteenth times. "It seem that many memories come back to me if you keep holding me likes this.."

"Then, I should hug you forever.."

"Auw..you've been so cheesy lately" Kim Junmyeon lightly hit the younger on shoulder. 

"I don't mind to be cheesy just for you.."

 "If i'm your lightsaber, will you be my Park Yoda?.."

"Hahaha..You're so funny Jun. I don't want to be you Park Yoda. I want to be your Park Chanyeol.."

 

 

They looked into each other's eyes. So much temptation that attracted both of them slowly into a passionate kiss that was filled the love they had for each other. Kim Junmyeon felt his heart was going to burst. 

When they slightly parted from each other, the younger caressed his face. 

 "I think we forget about something.." Park Chanyeol grinned at him. 

"About what?" Kim Junmyeon puzzled. 

"To say thanks to SM Entertainment,  Lee Soo Man and Exo. Because of them, we are together now..isn't it?

"So cheesy..Can you not Park Chanyeol? I just can't with you.." Kim Junmyeon blushed, his face flushing a pretty pink. 

"But you love me.."

"I am not.." Kim Junmyeon tried to put a protest. 

"Yes you are.."

"Yes I am. I am deeply in love with Park Chanyeol.." Kim Junmyeon finally surrender. Because his heart was all for the man name Park Chanyeol. There would be no other man that can replace him in his heart. 

 

_'To love someone is nothing,'_

_'To be loved by someone is something,'_

_'But to be loved by the one you love is everything.'_

 

Kim Junmyeon felt grateful that they had and loved each other, and afterall, that was all that matter the most. 


End file.
